1/26/2010

All warm and fuzzy

God & the Universe may have given me a dumb blonde karma, but at least they’ve blessed me with a mother who truly hears me when I self-deprecate.

I’d just sent her an email about how an ad agency had expressed some interest in me and told me they’d call me back the next day.  And I felt pretty good until I found out that they’d also been asking around about my old art director, hoping that we could work together as a team.  So when this agency found out that she is already art directing somewhere else and I didn’t hear back from them the next day, I told my mom that they must’ve wanted her – and I was just included.  Like the plastic fork that comes with the salad.  The sticker on the banana.  The ketchup packet that comes with the burger.

Almost immediately, I got an email back from my mom.  It started with, “Dear Ketchup,” 



And that y'all, is the kind of thing is that confirms that this woman is my own flesh and blood.




P.S. It turns out that I am not a plastic fork after all.  And the good news for y'all is that I will soon  be Stupid New Girl somewhere else.  Get ready.

1/18/2010

Once a salesperson, always a manipulative little bitch

Conversation this morning with the sales guy in the next cubicle:

ME: Hey, how are you?  How was your weekend?

congenial chitchat and exchanging of weekend stories

ME: That's great, sounds like a good weekend.  Oh and hey by the way, can you send me the updates for the Top 20 list?

HIM: Wait a minute.  Is that why you came over here to ask me about my weekend?

I guess it takes one to know one and all that.

1/14/2010

Just ask Earl Hickey

Dear Person who stole my Beautiful iPod Nano,

I have just this to say:  My karma may be a dumb blonde, but she is real and so is yours.

Love,

bebe Me

P.S.  And even if I do end up finding the shiny pink light of my life under the seat in my car, well then I'm still not going to apologize for writing this note.  Mostly because you don't exist.