Buy ye an iPod Nano.
At first, I resisted. Oh how I resisted. Because I had an 80 GB CLASSIC video iPod – a gift of thanks from the granite employers in return for my seven years of servitude as a client/showroom-girl babysitter. And by golly, an 80 GB classic video iPod was good enough for me. But God and the Universe (G&U) are very, very sneaky. Especially when they speak through other people. And other things:
G&U speak through my temp job (end of July)
My resistance: Even if I wanted a Nano, how would my unemployed self afford such a thing? And anyway, I already have my classic video iPod.
Their answer: My classic video iPod stopped working on the first day of my temp job, a.k.a source of income.
Through the lips of an Apple Store Genius Bar Genius
My resistance: I can get my classic iPod fixed. I mean, hello, geniuses.
Their answer: Apple Genius sticks my classic up to his ear, shakes his head slowly and says, “A new hard drive is going to cost you at least $300. You know what you should do? You should trade this in for a discount and get an iPod Nano.” He might as well have taken the stiletto heel off my foot and pierced it through my heart. I did NOT spend seven years calling emergency meetings to resolve cat fights over where to set the showroom thermostat for anything less than a device that costs at LEAST $400.
Through Google (yes, I know – isn’t Google God & the Universe?)
My resistance: I know how to Google. Genius, Shmenius, I’ll fix my classic iPod by myself.
Their answer: You know how they say you can water and love a plant so much that it dies? Same goes for 80 GB classic video iPods .
Through the color pink
My resistance. It’s all good. I still have my pink Sansa Clip that I use for my workouts. Sure its screen sucks, but it plays my tunes and my podcasts. And did I mention? It’s pink.
Their answer: THE IPOD NANO COMES IN PINK.
Through a new friend (beginning of September)
My resistance: How do I know the Nano’s going to be any better than the Sansa Clip? The Sansa is so tiny and light!.
Their answer: I met a new friend who'd just moved to Dallas and guess what he had hooked up in his car? Oh yes, that. He tossed it to me and told me to pick out a song. How could I ignore how small, light, and SLEEK it was. And oh, the iPod screen. How I’d missed the iPod screen.
Through the death of my lovely white earbuds, which came with my classic iPod (mid-September)
My resistance: I can’t give up on my classic iPod yet. I still have his earbuds. Part of him is still alive! Just REPLACE him with a Nano? So cavalier.
Their answer: Killed the earbuds.
Through Steve Jobs - see parentheses after Google. (end of September)
My resistance: Yes but the Sansa Clip? I can listen to the radio on it! And I’ve always hated that my iPod could never play the radio.
Their answer: An email announcing what else but the unveiling of the 5G iPod Nano. The one with the video camera, the pedometer, the genius mixing and iTunes tagging. Wait a minute, iTunes tagging? Doesn’t that mean it has a-??? HOLY CRAP, G&U TOLD STEVE JOBS TO INCLUDE AN FM TUNER JUST SO THAT I WOULD BUY THE DAMN IPOD NANO. (And yes, it has occurred to me that sometimes I’m somewhat narcissistic.)
Through one. last. death (very end of September)
My resistance: You can’t tell me what to do! I will use this Sansa Clip until the day it DIES.
Their answer: Can’t you guess?
Which is when I threw myself on the ground, thrust my hands up toward heaven and all that and said, “FINE. I WILL BUY A 5G iPOD NANO. IN PINK.”
So I did. And y’all, I’m not going to lie. I’m a little bit in love with it.
I mean, after all, it was God, the Universe, Google AND Steve Jobs. It’s a miracle that I just have a new iPod and that I’m not out proselytizing some sort of cosmologic religion in which you pray to your Apple computer’s Google search bar.
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